The music! The vibe! The fashion! There’s not much we don’t love about festivals. Yes, we’d even put up with the 3am walks to the portaloos and the mega-long queue for the showers if it means we get to see Adele or Red Hot Chili Peppers live and in the flesh – even if it is from the back of a 10,000-strong crowd and it’s chucking it down with rain.
But if there’s one thing we’re not so keen on, it’s the extortionate mark-up prices for food and drink. If we’re paying £10 for a burrito, it had better be the best bloomin’ burrito this side of Mexico. You can’t blame us for wanting to get creative with sneaking in our own food and drink – and the following 8 hacks are quite simply genius.
1. Don’t Forget The Suncream
Obviously we are all responsible guys and gals, and so our chances of forgetting the factor 50 are next-to-nothing. But while we’re packing for the 40-degree weather we’ll 100% definitely have in the UK, we’ll also be packing these fake sunscreen lotion bottles which can be filled up with everything from your favourite spirit to your preferred Waitrose hummus.
2. Look Good While Staying Hydrated
Never again will we have to choose between looking good and keeping our fluid levels up. This paddle brush flask holds 6 oz of liquid and is fully functional as a hairbrush. It even features a mirror on the back so you’ll be ready for all the possible outcomes.
3. Get Inventive With The Excuses
Now, we wouldn’t normally advocate lying, but sometimes a little white lie can save you all the dollars in the long run. Most festivals won’t allow you to bring in outside food, but will sometimes waive this rule if you have strict allergies or diabetes, or even if you’re vegan. It doesn’t always work, but it can’t hurt to ask, can it?
4. Wrap Up Food and Drink in Your Bag
With tens of thousands of people descending on one site, more often than not the venue guards will just have a quick ‘courtesy’ look inside your open bags. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve managed to sneak in sweets and drinks just by wrapping them up tight inside a cardigan. Then, when the guard takes a look inside, simply ‘helpfully’ move the cardigan to one side and then you’re done!
Also – girls definitely shouldn’t underestimate the power of the period. Hide your snacks underneath a solid layer of feminine supplies and you can be guaranteed no-one will want to dig through all that. Or, just invest in some fake tampon flasks to help you smuggle that drink in (yes, these genuinely, truly exist).
5. …Or Just Use Your Bag
Why smuggle alcohol in INSIDE your bag, when you can smuggle alcohol in using your ACTUAL bag? This stylish 80s-style messenger bag doesn’t just look the retro part, but it has a concealed area for stashing your alcohol dregs. Put it on your wish lists now.
6. Invest in a Good Bra
Sneak your wine rack into the festival using your own rack. Yes, you heard me! These comfy bras from The Wine Rack hold up to 25 ounces of your favourite drink, and come complete with a long drinking tube. For an added party drink, just don’t tell anyone that you’ve got it on, and watch their confused faces as your bust goes down several sizes in one afternoon.
7. Hollow Out Some Bread
Of course, this one only works if you’re allowed to take off-site food into the festival area. So, make sure you check beforehand otherwise you could be out of drink AND a hollowed-out piece of baguette, and tears will flow.
8. Buried Treasure
This one takes a little bit of time, preparation and thought – but it’s all worth it for that ability to save £3.99 over the course of a weekend, right?
A few weeks before the festival comes to town, have a quick reckee around the field in question, looking for a spot within the arena area that will (hopefully) be clear of any portaloos, stages and police gatherings. Then, dig deep and plant a stash of non-perishable food and drink, like cans of coke, tins of beans and peanut butter. You can even throw in some pasta if you’re feeling a bit ~fancy~ and can find somewhere to boil it…